my life or His

Here's an excerpt from a blog I found when I was googling around (mentioned in previous post). She was writing about her family and having issues having children. Then God blessed them with twins. But it wasn't without pain and struggling.

Blog title:
His Plan, Not Mine
(yeah, right? so God) :)

There have been times I have wondered what it was that God was trying to tell me as I struggle with these feelings of inadequacy, and sometimes find myself wondering if I am ever going to be able to fulfill MY PLANS and MY DREAMS and MY HOPES for what I want to DO with MY life.

Mary Beth Chapman has felt that same way her entire life and marriage.  She still struggles with it, and one of the things I really took to heart from her story is: that is ok. She said "I have come to learn that my life would be much easier if I would just lay aside all the things that I WANT FOR MY LIFE TO BE and let GOD continue to work out his plan for me on HIS TIME AND HIS PLAN."

That hit like a hammer driving the nail home

I prayed earnestly and longed for this life. I cannot have all the things that I want and desire for my life to be, and have His plan as well for it. They just dont jive. I need to lay those things down, and dive into the beautiful and precious responsibilities that God has given me. Others would in some ways bring glory only to me, and the path He has me on, the one He seems to have chosen for my life, is the better one because it leaves me out of the picture and brings Him fully into it as the center of attention--where He should be.

I think there is a time and a season for all things in my life. It is in laying down those selfish desires and seeing what it is that I have been blessed with right in front of me. It is being open to saying :"God, I am going to step up and lay this at your feet, knowing you have already answered one of my greatest heart's desires, and in YOUR time, you will take care of this one as your part of the plan if YOU WANT TO."

Do you have something like that in your life? Is there something that you have been wrestling with God about as you try to superimpose what you want on what HE wants for you?

Lay it down. You, like me, would simply be missing out on the blessings He already has planned for yourself looking back and wondering how you ever thought something else could be more important than what was already given into your hands to mold and shape and love.