Funny how when I let go of my condo deadline, I actually don't feel that disappointed when a place I thought would be good actually wasn't. I really do trust that the right place will come at the right time. It won't be a matter of me settling on something. It won't be a matter of me forcing it to happen. It (clearly) won't be on my timeline. Is anything ever? Not really.. but it all always works out, and even better than I would be able to make it happen.
His plan really is better than mine. Only days, months, years after can I look back and say "Wow, I really am better off" because such and such happened, or the relationship with so and so ended, or this or that was delayed for a while. But really, that's all I have to say about the past, it really has been for the best. I've always been better off for whatever happened or didn't.
I'm better off not getting into a condo that's too expensive, too far from work/school, in a less than desirable neighborhood, etc. etc. just because I want it so badly.
Patience, young'n. It'll all happen in due time. His time. It's never really been on your time. <3
Friday, September 30, 2011
Friday, September 23, 2011
deadlines
So I see this massage therapist occasionally (aka not enough) and she is really, really great. Tonight we were talking about condo shopping. I was telling her about my frustrations with a couple great places coming along and then being sold either hours after I saw them or the day I found it online. It's hard to not get discouraged. I'm very particular about what I want and where and all of that, and I should be.. it's my hard-earned money that I'm investing. It's not an overnight kind of decision.
But when I set out I had a goal - before snowfall. Definitely before the end of 2011.
Her advice to me tonight - let go of the deadline.
She said it was holding me back. From fully experiencing everything right now, from trusting in the process, and ultimately, from allowing the right place to come into my life. I have been to focused on it NOT happening yet that I'm not even letting it happen at all.
I'll have to take some time to process it, but I know she's right. I'm blocking myself from what I ultimately want. I keep focusing each day on the fact that it hasn't happened yet, and it's one day closer to winter, and why haven't I found it yet..
Being stuck in this place of frustration isn't helping anything.
So that's the next task.. letting it go. Trusting that God has the right place waiting for me and it will come along in just the right time. (The parallels between condo searching and my love life (lack thereof) is *ahem* annoying, to say the least. But also humorous. At least I can laugh at myself.)
Time for another night's sleep and then two days of a yard sale which will hopefully bring in the dough so I can buy a condo, someday, whenever that might be. :)
But when I set out I had a goal - before snowfall. Definitely before the end of 2011.
Her advice to me tonight - let go of the deadline.
She said it was holding me back. From fully experiencing everything right now, from trusting in the process, and ultimately, from allowing the right place to come into my life. I have been to focused on it NOT happening yet that I'm not even letting it happen at all.
I'll have to take some time to process it, but I know she's right. I'm blocking myself from what I ultimately want. I keep focusing each day on the fact that it hasn't happened yet, and it's one day closer to winter, and why haven't I found it yet..
Being stuck in this place of frustration isn't helping anything.
So that's the next task.. letting it go. Trusting that God has the right place waiting for me and it will come along in just the right time. (The parallels between condo searching and my love life (lack thereof) is *ahem* annoying, to say the least. But also humorous. At least I can laugh at myself.)
Time for another night's sleep and then two days of a yard sale which will hopefully bring in the dough so I can buy a condo, someday, whenever that might be. :)
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