the six and the nine

Just took this test called the Enneagram and well....

The Questioner (the Six)

• Questioners are responsible, trustworthy, and value loyalty to family, friends, groups, and causes. Their personalities range broadly from reserved and timid to outspoken and confrontative.

How to Get Along with Me

• Be direct and clear.
• Listen to me carefully.
• Don't judge me for my anxiety.
• Work things through with me.
• Reassure me that everything is OK between us.
• Laugh and make jokes with me.
• Gently push me toward new experiences.
• Try not to overreact to my overreacting.

What I Like About Being a Six

• being committed and faithful to family and friends
• being responsible and hardworking
• being compassionate toward others
• having intellect and wit
• being a nonconformist
• confronting danger bravely
• being direct and assertive

What's Hard About Being a Six

• the constant push and pull involved in trying to make up my mind
• procrastinating because of fear of failure; having little confidence in myself
• fearing being abandoned or taken advantage of
• exhausting myself by worrying and scanning for danger
• wishing I had a rule book at work so I could do everything right
• being too critical of myself when I haven't lived up to my expectations

Sixes as Children Often

are friendly, likable, and dependable, and/or sarcastic, bossy, and stubborn
are anxious and hypervigilant; anticipate danger
form a team of "us against them" with a best friend or parent
look to groups or authorities to protect them and/or question authority and rebel
are neglected or abused, come from unpredictable or alcoholic families, and/or take on the fearfulness of an overly anxious parent

Sixes as Parents

are often loving, nurturing, and have a strong sense of duty
are sometimes reluctant to give their children independence
worry more than most that their children will get hurt
sometimes have trouble saying no and setting boundaries

and

The Peacemaker (the Nine)

• Peacemakers are receptive, good-natured, and supportive. They seek union with others and the world around them.

How to Get Along with Me

• If you want me to do something, how you ask is important. I especially don't like expectations or pressure.
• I like to listen and to be of service, but don't take advatage of this.
• Listen until I finish speaking, even though I meander a bit.
• Give me time to finish things and make decisions. It's OK to nudge me gently and nonjudgmentally.
• Ask me questions to help me get clear.
• Tell me when you like how I look. I'm not averse to flattery.
• Hug me, show physical affection. It opens me up to my feelings.
• I like a good discussion but not a confrontation.
• Let me know you like what I've done or said.
• Laugh with me and share in my enjoyment of life.

What I Like About Being a Nine

• being nonjudgmental and accepting
• caring for and being concerned about others
• being able to relax and have a good time
• knowing that most people enjoy my company; I'm easy to be around
• my ability to see many different sides of an issue and to be a good mediator and facilitator
• my heightened awareness of sensations, aesthetics, and the here and now
• being able to go with the flow and feel one with the universe

What's Hard About Being a Nine

• being judged and misunderstood for being placid and/or indecisive
• being critical of myself for lacking initiative and discipline
• being too sensitive to criticism; taking every raised eyebrow and twitch of the mouth personally
• being confused about what I really want
• caring too much about what others will think of me
• not being listened to or taken seriously

Nines as Children Often

feel ignored and that their wants, opinions, and feelings are unimportant
tune out a lot, especially when others argue
are "good" children: deny anger or keep it to themselves

Nines as Parents

are supportive, kind, and warm
are sometimes overly permissive or nondirective